GaileTheSototG: November 2015

Saturday, November 7, 2015

Things I wish I knew as a kid

People who are deliberately unkind usually have a personal inward reason. Even if it's directed at you and you believe you deserve the abuse, It's not your fault. If you're a kid and the abuser is an adult, avoidance may be the best bet. If that's not possible &/or it gets too bad, tell an adult with authority who you trust. You cannot tolerate being unsafe no matter who is at fault.
The best way to have friends is to BE a friend. Which "friends" appeal to you tells a lot. Cliques are fickle. The insiders come & go. The attachment is usually based on popularity, not on genuine affection. A desire to belong & be admired is a strong one & can make belonging to a popular group very appealing. Having one, or very few true sincere attachments can be lifelong. Be kind to the new kid. Stick up for the downtrodden. Make conversation with the kid who always sits or eats alone. There are always things to talk about. If there is something nice to say about someone such as how they act, what they say, their interests, abilities, a new piece of clothing, haircut, ANYTHING. Don't overdo it so it sounds insincere, but don't hold back. Many times people will remember it for their whole life. Unkind words can be unforgettable too. Never be the source of that.
Never say anything about someone that you wouldn't say if they were with you. If you have a problem with someone take them aside & deal directly. If it's a serious problem that is beyond solving, take it to an objective person in a position to help. VERY IMPORTANT; You can determine a lot about a person by how they treat people, especially how they treat someone in a lower position or who can't benefit them. If people speak badly of others, are rude to servers in restaurants, their secretary, anyone in their family or neighbors, beware. Do not form serious personal, business, friendship relationships with them. If they are capable and especially habitual in that behavior, YOU can expect the same treatment. As an adult, this is something to teach your children. Learning these truths can help them avoid falling in love with or doing business with people who will cause them pain. If they're attracted to people like that, there may be issues needing attention.
If you had a toxic relationship with your parents and it resulted in low self esteem, realize that not all parents are mature. Some people NEVER grow up. If they're still living, be respectful but know that they were wrong to mistreat you and it was more a reflection on them than on you. There are no coincidences. You were dealt the life you have for a reason. You would'nt be you if your life was different. If you seriously reflect on how things happened & progressed sometimes it makes sense. You or others can learn from your experience. You can identify & break cycles if you are deliberate about it. Let the old hurts go. Your parents lived their lives, you can choose your own path as an adult.
Finally, you are NEVER alone. God really did know you before the earth existed. He is outside of time. He knows the smallest most obscure details of your existence; physical, mental, spiritual. I have the pleasure & awesome blessing of being able to search the scriptures with a software from Israel that proves God knew about all of us before the time of Moses, who lived long before Jesus. I do hospice work, private duty. Over the years I've searched the Torah (5 books of Moses) for my clients and ALWAYS found clusters of encryptions, hidden names/words within verses & chapters (ELS Code aka Equidistant Letter Sequence aka equal distance of letters between letters of the searched words) I have found last names, first names, nicknames, spouse/children/parents/pets/places/cars... it boggles the mind. I get tingles of amazement all the time. He really does know your troubles, your needs. Nothing is so big or so small or so modern that He doesn't know about it. Political, High tech, scientific theory, national security, historical figures, places, you can't believe it without seeing it. Well, I've rambled on long enough, have a blessed life, Love to all, Gaile